Sunday 29 March 2015

I Love You

I love you. I love you. I love you. 

I heard it 3 times in succession while I was there on my knees, tears pouring down my face. Like a whisper to my soul, like a hand in mine, like arms around me, I love you. I love you. I love you.

And that’s what I needed. A few weeks ago He said the only words He could to break me. And since then, every word, every whisper has just been a reminder.
 I love you. I want you. I want to bless you. 

Somewhere in the crazy mess of life, I’d stopped believing those things. I’d stopped understanding that He doesn’t love me because He has to. He doesn’t just stick around because He has to. He wants to love me. He wants to bless me. He gives good gifts to His Children, and I am part of that.

So that’s where I’ve been. So broken and so helpless and drowning in tears, and yet, He’s holding me up. He’s teaching me about a love that forces down barriers; that breaks through the walls around my heart, and the walls around my trust. Every single time I have crumpled to my knees in tears, He’s just whispered again and again, I love you. I love you. You’re going to be okay.

This is a love I don’t understand, and yet, it’s where I always want to be found. He loves us.

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